Home » SIRTECH CLASSICS » Jagged Alliance 2 » Favourite Mercs & NPCs » Funniest Quotes ?
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46191] Mon, 28 June 2004 07:19 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DNA from the Lowlands is currently offline DNA from the Lowlands

 
Messages:337
Registered:July 2003
Pardon if this is a double entry...

Alma mine defense: Conrad/Shank/Dynamo/Maddog + blueshirts.
After the previous attack I had forgotten to put Shank/Conrad back in position.
Reds enter sector: 3 guys in a 5 square radius around Conrad, about same for Shank.
Shank didn't even make it through the opponents-turn*.
Near the end of the 1st opponents turn Conrad had a line of sight on 7 enemies.

Somewhere here he utters: "I may be needing help"

Like has been said:Tyco:"What a Conrad that Conrad is..."

Conrad got one players turn, he even offed 2 guys, next he got the blue-air-stamina knocked out of him. ->I ALT-Xed it, reload & relocate.

*The drop in Dynamo's morale was huge like 20% left. (some comment about the 'good-ol'-Tixa-days'

Ooh Razor in low moral "I hate this."

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46192] Wed, 30 June 2004 19:14 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Cayenne is currently offline Cayenne

 
Messages:10
Registered:July 2003
Location: Vilnius, Lithuania
One more very nice, Blood after killing Mike:

"Aww, Mike wasn't so tough after all! I killed women who went down a lot harder than he did"

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Private
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46193] Wed, 28 July 2004 15:29 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Freakin' is currently offline Freakin'

 
Messages:28
Registered:July 2004
Location: Holland
I was just reading this forum and decided to put an oldy up here from JADG

When Fidel kills someone:I check pulse..no?

Well that was worth registering for Cool

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46194] Thu, 29 July 2004 00:46 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Doc Croc is currently offline Doc Croc

 
Messages:91
Registered:September 2003
Location: VT
Probably been mentioned but one of my favorite lines is when Gus sees mike for the first time and says that if you let him kill him he won't bug you for nothin' no mo.

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46195] Mon, 09 August 2004 07:30 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Jabberdau is currently offline Jabberdau

 
Messages:5
Registered:June 2004
Location: Denmark
Just heard some funny ones today when encountering the bugs:

Magic: I bet THAT, would make a big crunh if you stepped on it.

Static: I saw one og those in 67 or was it 69, but back then it wasnt real.(something like that).

Static had a few funny ones more but I cant remember them. Something with that he didnt like to get his but kicked by a bug, especially not when it was bigger than himself.

EDIT: Just heard this one when listening to the slf files:

Nails when Bull dies: They got Bull? Man...must have used an elephant gun.

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Private
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46196] Wed, 29 September 2004 18:26 Go to previous messageGo to next message
blackmac is currently offline blackmac

 
Messages:91
Registered:July 2002
Location: MNL
Pussy! ...

- IMP #3, upon seeing bloodcats

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46197] Wed, 29 September 2004 20:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DNA from the Lowlands is currently offline DNA from the Lowlands

 
Messages:337
Registered:July 2003
Too MUCH !!!

Fem-IMP #?, after a kill. (nicest after a graphic-bonus, ...not just a thud)

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46198] Wed, 29 September 2004 20:44 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Gideon

 
Messages:54
Registered:February 2003
Location: Uppsala/Sweden
Hamous: "Me miss de old guys, but me no miss Vinny."

For all of you who played JA1 and DG you will understand why.

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46199] Thu, 30 September 2004 05:27 Go to previous messageGo to next message
CatSpam is currently offline CatSpam

 
Messages:75
Registered:May 2004
Location: Canada
This list isn't complete without my signature line (spoken by my custom merc - male voice #3).

He says it whenever an enemy just misses him.

It became my favorite line after the one last attacking enemy in the Meduna garden fired a LAW at a group of four of my mercenaries. The enemy missed everyone and blew up a fountain way behind my group.

That is when my custom merc said...

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46200] Thu, 30 September 2004 05:52 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Dave Z is currently offline Dave Z

 
Messages:93
Registered:March 2004
Location: Czech Republic
Guess where Conrad says: "Remain calm, it's just bug."

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46201] Thu, 30 September 2004 09:46 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Sarge McSarge is currently offline Sarge McSarge

 
Messages:51
Registered:February 2000
Location: Queenstown, New Zealand
Grunty after exploding a head in his always calm fake german accent

"What a spectacular way to die"

Sarge

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46202] Sat, 02 October 2004 18:50 Go to previous messageGo to next message
blackmac is currently offline blackmac

 
Messages:91
Registered:July 2002
Location: MNL
Hey, I got a new one (hope nobody posted it before) ...

Suck my exhaust ... :biglaugh:

- Nails, after 'nailing' a difficult shot

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46203] Sun, 03 October 2004 22:24 Go to previous messageGo to next message
The NumbNuts is currently offline The NumbNuts

 
Messages:75
Registered:May 2004
Location: Keuruu, Finland

"Dammit, dammit, dammit, damn it to hell"

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46204] Sat, 09 October 2004 11:50 Go to previous messageGo to next message
jamotide

 
Messages:39
Registered:July 2002
Location: Germany
Hey I find it hilarious how Gus always calls you woody etc., me and my friends always called that each other for a year after playing DG.Maybe its more funny if your not english.

Gaskets quotes are funny, something like "Its like the time I bit myself in the foot...that like a long story though." too funny how he says it.

Or Mike in DG when you hired him for 10 grand: "Another day another dollar, or a couple of thousand for that matter!"

Heres a nice one from Mouse about Fox from DG:

Mousefox.mp3

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46205] Sun, 10 October 2004 05:40 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Aecho is currently offline Aecho

 
Messages:261
Registered:August 2003
Location: The Netherlands, Europe
After listening to that i can only think of those good old DG days...*sigh* I AM getting old.

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46206] Wed, 13 October 2004 05:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
-CHAZZ- is currently offline -CHAZZ-

 
Messages:83
Registered:August 2003
Location: Croatia, Europe
Danny, when multiple enemies are sighted:"Got my testicles in a sling here!" he he..

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46207] Wed, 13 October 2004 10:38 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Sarge McSarge is currently offline Sarge McSarge

 
Messages:51
Registered:February 2000
Location: Queenstown, New Zealand
Morgan, when he views an exploding head
"Musta been a ten foot spray on that"
:yikes:

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46208] Fri, 15 October 2004 05:48 Go to previous messageGo to next message
-CHAZZ- is currently offline -CHAZZ-

 
Messages:83
Registered:August 2003
Location: Croatia, Europe
Igor(when his Explosives skill is 90 and he just discovered a landmine):"WHOA! i do not like what i see on ground! And i no talk about dog droppings!" Smile

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46209] Wed, 27 October 2004 01:56 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Mental7 is currently offline Mental7

 
Messages:29
Registered:October 2004
My personal favourites come from female voice 2 during the bug hunts, when she can't peg a name on the critters: "big whatever-they-ares," "big whozeewhatsis," and "what-the-hell-do-you-call-that."

But Buzz is pretty cool when the enemy flees, too: "They pulled out early. Typical men." (or something similar)

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46210] Wed, 27 October 2004 19:24 Go to previous messageGo to next message
jamotide

 
Messages:39
Registered:July 2002
Location: Germany
Hehe cool, I gotta try female IMP 2 next time.

Just came across this one:

Raven: "I'm losing blood!"
Meltdown: "Well hang on pussy! I got the same situation here!"

Its too cool that they even respond to each others standard quotes.

Meltdown with bad morale is hilarious,too. She really confirms every command by calling you asshole, or "Dink" (or something like that?).

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46211] Sat, 30 October 2004 19:16 Go to previous messageGo to next message
AZAZEL is currently offline AZAZEL

 
Messages:750
Registered:February 2004
And guess where and when Foxy says:"This is not looking very good".

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First Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46212] Sat, 30 October 2004 19:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Mental7 is currently offline Mental7

 
Messages:29
Registered:October 2004
Quote:
Originally posted by jamotide:
Hehe cool, I gotta try female IMP 2 next time.

Just came across this one:

Raven: "I'm losing blood!"
Meltdown: "Well hang on pussy! I got the same situation here!"

Its too cool that they even respond to each others standard quotes.

Meltdown with bad morale is hilarious,too. She really confirms every command by calling you asshole, or "Dink" (or something like that?).
About responding to quotes: I actually thought that they really did. In my first campaigns I had Fox and Buzz, and as soon as Fox went "That was close" little Buzzie always did her sarcastic "You call that close?" I thought it was just wonderful how they reacted to each other, even though I later learned they didn't, really. But Fox is one suggestive babe with all her innuendo and Lolita-type comments. "Wait a minute! I don't trust this any more than I would a man's zipper."

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46213] Wed, 03 November 2004 19:57 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Cagemonkey is currently offline Cagemonkey

 
Messages:275
Registered:December 2001
Location: Sweden
Lynx has a good one when he does a headshot: "I once made funny comments about that kind of stuff but I

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46214] Tue, 09 November 2004 01:42 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Sturm is currently offline Sturm

 
Messages:88
Registered:July 2003
Location: Elyria,Ohio
Rude Dog .Killing Lynn(wasn't going to junp in the sack with her and she didn't smell like a T-Bone ,so she had to Die.) :placard:

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Corporal 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46215] Fri, 03 December 2004 02:44 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Danirijeka is currently offline Danirijeka

 
Messages:45
Registered:November 2004
Location: Levico Terme, Italy
..."Holy squirrel tails! It must be my birthday!" ...guess who? Very Happy

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46216] Sun, 05 December 2004 08:51 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Charlie-Dog is currently offline Charlie-Dog
Messages:1
Registered:September 2004
Location: Prague CZ
I'm just playing second replay of UC and I wanted to create new team with mercs I've never played before.
"Hello, Fidel is in appliance."
I just couldn't hang up.
Very Happy

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Civilian
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46217] Mon, 06 December 2004 19:44 Go to previous messageGo to next message
pavel is currently offline pavel

 
Messages:38
Registered:November 2004
Location: Russia/South Africa
Been playing ja1 and jadg over the last couple of weeks to refresh ny memory and came across a few funny phrases.

Ivan when bored: This reminds me of the good old days, I do nothing and I get paid.

Ivan when running away with money: Today I learned more about capitalism than you ever will.

Spam when you hire him: I can't wait for the chance to actually discharge my weapon.

Leech quitting due to boredom: This place has about as much action as a morgue without bodies.

Fidel when touched by man: I see you later, no?

Fidel when touched by woman: Fidel no like this!
(make your own conclusions about Fidel's sexual preferences, I dont think its a bug)

Fox when touched: Thats going to cost you dinner and a movie.

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46218] Wed, 15 December 2004 19:51 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Danirijeka is currently offline Danirijeka

 
Messages:45
Registered:November 2004
Location: Levico Terme, Italy
"Hello, here is Cynthia Guzzman. I'm kinda...tied up at the moment."

Every word Fox says has a sexual meaning...ALWAYS! Very Happy

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46219] Wed, 15 December 2004 22:00 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Jogge is currently offline Jogge

 
Messages:29
Registered:October 2003
Location: Sweden
Postie from UC: "I was promised carnage, plenty of carnage!"

Not so fun in itself but the way Postie expresses his frustrated disappointment always cracks me up.

J - back to work Sad

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Private 1st Class
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46220] Thu, 16 December 2004 10:03 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Sarge McSarge is currently offline Sarge McSarge

 
Messages:51
Registered:February 2000
Location: Queenstown, New Zealand
Rosebud when you capture Drake G2.
"Oh OH! We should stop at the theater here. I here they're playing "Rambo" again. That guy is so cool isn't he?"
Sarge

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46221] Fri, 17 December 2004 05:17 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Aecho is currently offline Aecho

 
Messages:261
Registered:August 2003
Location: The Netherlands, Europe
Buns when she spots Mike; Ooooh it's Mike *sarcastic* We're in trouble now!

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46222] Fri, 24 December 2004 14:00 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Alias Smith & Wesson is currently offline Alias Smith & Wesson

 
Messages:6
Registered:January 2001
What is the English translation when Malice says:

Salut, ti'qu!

After he kills an enemy? My basic French is not up to the task.

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Private
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46223] Fri, 24 December 2004 19:54 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Claudius is currently offline Claudius

 
Messages:15
Registered:January 2004
Location: France
I would say "So long, little ass"

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Private
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46224] Sat, 01 January 2005 14:28 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Volly is currently offline Volly
Messages:3
Registered:December 2004
Stephen seeing Mike: Mikes here? Working for them... We're going to have to kill Mike.( just love how matter of fact it is)

Barry after head pop: "I have seen men die this way. It naesiates me."

Barry's return e-mail for A.I.M. server. something like... "Hello, this is Barry Unger, I am responding to your responce to my voice responce mechanism..."

Grizzly after head pop: "Man! That's gotta hurt. Then again maybe not..."

Grunty when flee: "Ya, the enemies have left the sector. The wimps."

Grunty spotting Joey: something like..." Isn't that the boy Joey? With his mothers permission I will happily apply a good walloping to his buttocks!"

and a lot of others all ready listed.

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Civilian
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46225] Sun, 02 January 2005 05:37 Go to previous messageGo to next message
DNA from the Lowlands is currently offline DNA from the Lowlands

 
Messages:337
Registered:July 2003
Haha Barry's Re:Re:Re:

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Master Sergeant
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46226] Wed, 05 January 2005 22:00 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Tero Laaksonen is currently offline Tero Laaksonen
Messages:2
Registered:January 2005
Location: Finland
These crack me up:

Steroid: "Gun is empty. Dammit to hell!"

Barry: "Gun is dependable. I am very satisfied with gun."

Buns: "HAHAHAHA... it is not really funny..."

Ivan (in the A.I.M. roster): "Gun, all gun, like finger in hand."

Magic: "Good stuff..."

Cougar: "Must... suppress... nausea!"

Fidel (answering machine): "Fidel like to kill and Fidel like money."

and, of course:

Buzz: "I

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Civilian
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46227] Wed, 12 January 2005 22:36 Go to previous messageGo to next message
avoideverything is currently offline avoideverything

 
Messages:52
Registered:January 2005
Location: UK
You probably have to be from Montreal to really get him, but everything Malice says is hilarious. If you're ever visiting the city, go to any bar in the East End and you'll see 100 Malice's.

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46228] Thu, 13 January 2005 03:46 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Danirijeka is currently offline Danirijeka

 
Messages:45
Registered:November 2004
Location: Levico Terme, Italy
Buns: "...and Gumpy, if this is you pulling out free email accounts from magazines, I'm going to stuff your modem where the sun doesn't shine." Very Happy

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46229] Thu, 13 January 2005 20:48 Go to previous messageGo to next message
TNT is currently offline TNT

 
Messages:49
Registered:June 2004
Location: Netherlands
Fidel - What is this Flo? She look like houswife. Maybe I kill her and do funny things with the body.
:yikes:

Makes you wonder what he did with Hurl before he fed him to the dog......

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Corporal
Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46230] Thu, 27 January 2005 09:17 Go to previous messageGo to previous message
MagicJuggler is currently offline MagicJuggler

 
Messages:24
Registered:January 2005
Fox upon receiving a really good item:

"This was worth bending over for."

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Private 1st Class
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