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Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46111]

Sun, 15 June 2003 13:14

Blackraven

Messages:5
Registered:June 2003
Location: Texas, USA

Quote:

Originally posted by CptCrunch:

Then there is Barry being interviewed after whoring ... "Women should always be treated respectfully even in places like this"

How do you hear that quote?

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46112]

Sun, 15 June 2003 14:10

dzeller

Messages:87
Registered:February 2003
Location: USA

Quote:

Originally posted by CptCrunch:
Danny seeing a head explode
I think it goes something like "Reminds me of a story about a man who is crying becuase he had no hat .. until he met a head who had no head ... I don't know, just seem appropriate"

This one is good, i remember i nearly fell of my chair when i heard it! it was in chitzena sam i think but it is more like "It reminds me of the story of the man who was crying because he has no hat and then he was crying because he has no head...I don't know, just seem approriate".
Anyway it was good fun

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Corporal 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46113]

Mon, 16 June 2003 06:50

CptCrunch

Messages:36
Registered:June 2003
Location: Brookline, MA

BRaven

Barry randomly says that when you talk to him but it takes on a whole new meaning when he says that just after he paid cash money to get laid in San Mona. :diabolical:

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46114]

Tue, 17 June 2003 02:59

slayer

Messages:105
Registered:July 2002
Location: Mtn. View, Ca. Silicon Va...

Is there a file that actually list all IMP voice quotes in text?

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Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46115]

Tue, 17 June 2003 03:23

Elisa

Messages:1
Registered:June 2003
Location: Quebec

One of my favorite quote has to be Haywire when his gun jams. He goes "Out of ammo! No wait, no I'm not, my gun's jammed!"

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46116]

Tue, 17 June 2003 06:00

Blackraven

Messages:5
Registered:June 2003
Location: Texas, USA

When Ivan kills Deidranna: (rough English translation)"I kill the bitch!"

When you try to hire Ivan without enough funds: "Don't even think of screwing me - I'll kill you, f*cking bitch!"

Ivan's ending line:"In spit of the fact that Commander is an idiot...I proud to serve with you. Mission is complete."

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46117]

Thu, 19 June 2003 07:20

CptCrunch

Messages:36
Registered:June 2003
Location: Brookline, MA

On a similar vein, does any know the quotes various merc says when they witness or cause a head explosion? :rifle:

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46118]

Sun, 22 June 2003 18:56

Ray

Messages:6
Registered:February 2003
Location: Vancouver, BC

Just heard this from Mad dog

"hahahaha! They all fell like pantyhose from a five dollar woman".

after clearing a sector

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46119]

Sun, 22 June 2003 21:41

Easy Rhino

Messages:1
Registered:April 2003
Location: californey

Buzz: "Hey, it's Joey! I say we castrate him. Put an end to his errant ways"

(may have the details wrong, but definite castration)

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46120]

Thu, 17 July 2003 03:19

Drax1082

Messages:16
Registered:May 2002
Location: Turkey

after seeing rotten corpse igors quote isnt funny but it's interesting heh
about tolstoy
:type:

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46121]

Thu, 17 July 2003 05:24

CptCrunch

Messages:36
Registered:June 2003
Location: Brookline, MA

Spooky from SOG69 mod got some great quotes too.

"No more boom boom for Charlie" standard kill phrase

"Four men, Three bullets, I'll save one for later" seeing multiple enemies on screen

"You need 50 more of those to stop me" getting shot

"I can shoot a fly off your arm at 50 yards and I can get it four out of every five times"

"Hey buddy, I think you dropped something ... heh heh" Spooky exploding a head at close range

Ruiz got some good ones too.
"People are always telling me, Hey Ruiz, you gotta stop smoking, it's going to kill you. LOOK AT WHERE I AM! I am going to be killed anyways. Freaking freak!"

"Hey these freaking guys, they are all over the place!"

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46122]

Thu, 17 July 2003 18:56

FastZ

Messages:122
Registered:January 2003
Location: Aalten, Netherlands

I like this uncomplicated one from Nails after a burst shot kill:
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

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Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46123]

Thu, 17 July 2003 20:14

Didier

Messages:4
Registered:June 2003
Location: Netherlands

Grizzly after improving a point:

"Mom would be proud"

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46124]

Fri, 18 July 2003 07:32

jeremiah

Messages:26
Registered:April 2003
Location: Canada

I have just tried using the talk icon on my mercs. No matter how high their morale, their blurb is always unhappy about the group they hang around with. Think it's a bug.

However, I found Grunty's very funny. Something along the lines of these are not the worst bunch of people he has hung around with. He did attend 3 semesters of law school. I burst out laughing. Very Happy

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46125]

Fri, 18 July 2003 08:42

TrailBlazer

Messages:511
Registered:September 2001
Location: Athens, Greece

Bless you guys, you gave me a few moments laughing!

As for Grizzly's reply to "Leave Message" is my current signature - found it few days before i read the whole topic. Hehehe...

"Enemies located localy", "Damnit to heeeeell", "damnit damnit DAMNIT! this is not possibbooooool", "Grandma Contarski blesses me with great riches from heaven", "I sure as hell heard something - not funny, but i like it" are few of the lines i like most.

For some other cool texts, read AIM Alumni Very Happy

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First Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46126]

Sun, 20 July 2003 19:29

Harper

Messages:149
Registered:June 2003
Location: Germany

Gumpy in combat:

After getting nearly hit:
"WOW, you

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Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46127]

Wed, 23 July 2003 19:36

JURAJURA

Messages:64
Registered:March 2002
Location: GODING - MORAVIA - Heart ...

Gumpy - just call me Harry, Dirty Harry! ;]]

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Corporal

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46128]

Wed, 23 July 2003 22:02

Sibben

Messages:16
Registered:October 2000
Location: Sweden

Gontarski after clearing a sector:

"All evil has been lifted and separated!"

I guess that only makes real sense in his drug infused brain - but I like it!

I'm beginning to take Maddog out for spins too. He's not so good but he's got some lovely lines. After travelling:

"I ate every bug on the way...they were many!"

:luckystrike:

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46129]

Thu, 24 July 2003 00:23

Saturnine

Messages:31
Registered:August 2002

When you leave a message for Ivan his return email message says, "Hello, I am House now". Love his English skills.

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46130]

Thu, 24 July 2003 14:21

GreenStain9396

Messages:14
Registered:April 2003
Location: Texas, Guess where

Quote:

after seeing rotten corpse igors quote isnt funny but it's interesting heh
about tolstoy

Yeah, it goes something like "Barbaric! As Tolstoy wrote - War, what is it good for?"

This phrase also happens to be in a famous anti-war soul song in the U.S. I never thought it came from Tolstoy, though...

JA2 is Culture!

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46131]

Thu, 24 July 2003 20:28

Larynx

Messages:183
Registered:April 2003

Quote:

Yeah, it goes something like "Barbaric! As Tolstoy wrote - War, what is it good for?"

This phrase also happens to be in a famous anti-war soul song in the U.S. I never thought it came from Tolstoy, though...

JA2 is Culture!

Pop culture.

I think Igor's line is a joke which refers to something that happened in a Seinfeld episode. Jerry told Elaine that Tolstoy originally wrote that, and that's what inspired the song. Then Elaine embarassed herself by repeating that "information" in front of her boss and a famous author.

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Staff Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46132]

Thu, 24 July 2003 21:19

Heart

Messages:39
Registered:July 2003
Location: Bear's Pit (well, not all...

Ruiz after he has taken out a VC: that's what freaking guys get (with that super authenic intonation.
Sidney when Scope has died (before I reload): good old England will never forget you!
Spooky: everything.

There will never be a finite list.
:luckystrike:

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46133]

Fri, 25 July 2003 06:07

GreenStain9396

Messages:14
Registered:April 2003
Location: Texas, Guess where

Quote:

Pop culture.

I think Igor's line is a joke which refers to something that happened in a Seinfeld episode. Jerry told Elaine that Tolstoy originally wrote that, and that's what inspired the song. Then Elaine embarassed herself by repeating that "information" in front of her boss and a famous author.

Lol, Seinfeld... It's Sirtech after all... :headbanger:

P.S.: But we also have to consider one of Tolstoy's major works, "War and Peace", which was also made into one of the most expensive movies in history (a Russian movie). So, Igor's quote wouldn't be so far fetched at all.

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46134]

Sun, 27 July 2003 04:04

jeremiah

Messages:26
Registered:April 2003
Location: Canada

Here is some ending comments that amused me

Stephen when he offs Queen D that he hopes there are no more like her though he doubts it, because he has dated a few.

Blood, "No autographs please, I am a humble hero."

Conrad, comment good riddance since she never paid him on time.

As for parting comments in the cut scene,
Razor proposing that the group go to a neighboring country and starting something. Haywire asking for a raise, a big raise.

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46135]

Thu, 31 July 2003 06:08

dumont

Messages:1
Registered:July 2003
Location: Sweden

When I looked through the posts I noticed that no one mentioned this one:

Numb (after poppin

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46136]

Wed, 06 August 2003 06:41

trevorColby

Messages:26
Registered:August 2003

I like pretty much everything Trevor says and does... that's why he's my favorite merc.

"Look at me mate, ya know you're getting value for the dollar"... there's just something irrepressibly cool about the guy, in any situation.

I sent his voice files to an Australian friend of mine, who says that Trevor's accent is totally wrong, and that most of his slang isn't in current use either. I don't care ... Trevor rocks!

(He's expensive too I know, but I don't care, I always use small squads so there's plenty of money to go around in my campaigns).

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46137]

Wed, 20 August 2003 07:48

Maddack

Messages:4
Registered:December 2002
Location: Sweden

"It is good I will have some time to play with new plastiques. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to have blown things up for you."

Barry when getting dismissed (with good morale).

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46138]

Wed, 20 August 2003 17:06

Colt M1991A1

Messages:5
Registered:August 2003
Location: Australia

Living in Australia, I can safely say that no-one uses most of the slang Trevor uses any more. The accent is a bit dodgy (but pretty good for a Canadian company), so if I was going to place it, I'd say Outback Queensland- even though the background picture is the Sydney Opera House.

But the funniest quotes are had to pin down- there's so many of them!

One of my favourites is Sidney's comment when you interview him- "If you won't be in need of your telephone for the next couple of hours, I'd be more than willing to fax you my references..."

Other classics include anything by Spooky (SOG '69): "This thing is like a Cap Gun- All noise and no effect" (Weapon Malfunction), "This Blood will help me blend in with the dead Chucks", and "No more boom-boom for Charlie" (kills enemy).

Taylor (SOG '69) is pretty funny too- "These guys are pathetic, they're not even coming close!" (Under fire and not being hit) and "Who Else Wants Some???" (Kills enemy) being my favourites

IMP's "We have some inconveniences to dispose of!" never fails to make me smile, along with Meltdowns' "They're All Dead! Goddamn, I guess I'll have to deal with the disappointment".

Great thread, BTW!

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46139]

Fri, 22 August 2003 15:22

Maddack

Messages:4
Registered:December 2002
Location: Sweden

Oh forgot one... When you're at the outskirts of Meduna, the Elliot vs Deidranna scene where she shoots him in the head:

"Elliot you idiot! Are you so stupid you don't even know how to die properly?"

"Apparently not, your highness. I will try harder."

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46140]

Fri, 22 August 2003 20:04

Colt M1991A1

Messages:5
Registered:August 2003
Location: Australia

That's right! I'd forgotten about that one!

It's really funny, and when you finally reach the Palace, guess who's still alive? Very Happy

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46141]

Sat, 23 August 2003 08:00

CptCrunch

Messages:36
Registered:June 2003
Location: Brookline, MA

Steroid Gontarski got one of the most funny voicemail.

"Robert Gontarski is .... um..... unavoidable right now. Leave me your message and maybe I put him in touch with you. Maybe not."

I almost died laughing first time I heard it.

Buns' message is pretty funny too refering to Gumpy's internet stalking.

"You have reached my video voicemail. Please leave a message and Gumpy, if this is you, leave another message like the last one and I will send you something that explodes on impact. I am not kidding."

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46142]

Sat, 23 August 2003 17:46

Migrant Programmer

Messages:1
Registered:January 2001

Magic circa JADG, when grabbed by the opposite sex:
"Say hello to Snapper"

Even more funny, when grabbed by the same sex:
"Hey, soup for brains. If I return the favour, you're gonna be peeing out your ear."

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Civilian

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46143]

Sun, 24 August 2003 11:33

HexRei

Messages:21
Registered:April 2003
Location: portland, OR

Quote:

Originally posted by GreenStain9396:
Quote:
after seeing rotten corpse igors quote isnt funny but it's interesting heh
about tolstoy

Yeah, it goes something like "Barbaric! As Tolstoy wrote - War, what is it good for?"

This phrase also happens to be in a famous anti-war soul song in the U.S. I never thought it came from Tolstoy, though...

JA2 is Culture!

It's a Seinfeld reference. In one episode Kramer convinced Elaine that Tolstoy's original title for "War and Peace" was "War- What is it Good For?".
As one might expect, hilarity ensues.

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Private 1st Class

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46144]

Fri, 05 September 2003 19:42

JURAJURA

Messages:64
Registered:March 2002
Location: GODING - MORAVIA - Heart ...

Tex after head explosion: "Great special effect"

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Corporal

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46145]

Thu, 02 October 2003 04:58

Maddog

Messages:311
Registered:September 2003

I really liked all the Gasket's quotes. One of the funniest were his
"I think I pissed my pants.". I mean that it sounds so funny. Think about it.
And yeah, those "Elliot you idiot!" quotes, they were great!
At the original version, I never killed Elliot. I kinda like that guy.
Steroid also is very funny.

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Master Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46146]

Mon, 06 October 2003 08:24

Ghostface

Messages:8
Registered:October 2003

damn never got to hear the mike killing quotes, i try to finish every guy with my IMP merc, helps him raise levels faster no?

Stephen: "It's Mike! Mike is here? Working for them? We're going to have to kill Mike." so drawn out...

i cracked up first time i heard Magic's comment on exploding heads

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46147]

Wed, 08 October 2003 09:29

Harper

Messages:149
Registered:June 2003
Location: Germany

Noone is close to be as cool as Magic.

(Magic meets Mike)

"That hotshot Mike took a job with 'em. He's gonna pay just like the others."

(After he killed him)

"Here's a family name for him--Mike Gonnabecoldsoon!"

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Sergeant

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46148]

Wed, 22 October 2003 19:52

Magraev

Messages:9
Registered:February 2002
Location: Denmark

Playing a game with Blood now, and he's quite cool.

"I wasn't worried right...right" when shot at.

"Jalinqua" when killing a guy. Sounds good but what is that word, and how's it spelled?

I like Slay too (DL).

"Victims" when seeing opponents - too cool.

"Terminated" when making a kill.

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Private

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46149]

Thu, 23 October 2003 01:40

Gideon

Messages:54
Registered:February 2003
Location: Uppsala/Sweden

Y'all gotta love Devin's comment when popping a head:

-"Shit, I was counting on a new helmet!"

Or Conrad when the enemy misses:

-"Obviously, I did not train them."
Even in the training-center in Alma. Very Happy

And the first time I played it cracked me up to see that Hamous stole himself an Icecream Truck. Guess if I were suprised when I saw a hispanic dude beside an Icecream Truck. Smile

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Corporal

Re: Funniest Quotes ?[message #46150]

Thu, 23 October 2003 02:06

Aecho

Messages:261
Registered:August 2003
Location: The Netherlands, Europe

Buns when she pops a head "*giggles* I am sorry, it is not really funny" Very Happy

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Master Sergeant

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